My Life as a “Pet”

According to one Malaysian woman, I am Paul’s “Pet.” I thought I was going to a quite normal and easy manicure and pedicure – but, walked out with the understanding that no matter where you roam, tacky people exist.

It all started out quite benign. The women doing my nails asked about how long Paul and I had been married; I answered, “8 years – actually we’ll be celebrating our anniversary here in about a week and a half.” She thought that was nice, at least.
Here’s the continued conversation (she is in italics):
“Oh, any children?” Normally, a fairly okay question.
“No...” I’m thinking at this point – is she really going to go there?
“Oh, well, how old are you?” Oh, yes, she is going there.
“33.” I’ll play along for awhile.
“You have time.” She reasoned.
“Thank you.” But, before I could change the subject…
“Is your husband the same age?” She started digging a little deeper.
“No, he’s a bit older.”
“How much?” Oh, here we go…
“14 years.” SILENCE - Note: By this time I knew she was 53, etc. had two sons, was living away from her family here in S’pore. Way too much info for a simple mani and pedi!
“Hmmmm…well, here when you see a man who has an younger woman as a wife you can tell she is well taken care of…kind of his ‘pet’.” Oh, no, she didn’t!
Okay, so, I had my feet half painted and we hadn’t even gotten to my nails. I changed the subject.
“I have two collies – big dogs.”
She caught on…"Yes, so those are your babies."
“Yes.”

The unusual directness and strong opinions along with the use of the language make some conversations quite unbelievable. To give you reference I felt like if I had this conversation in the US it would have been like the woman saying, “…kind of his ‘trophy wife.’” So you know how awkward and inappropriate the situation becomes.

When I got back and related the story to Paul, he said, “Well, I thought I was your pet?” Anyway, we think she has it backwards and if you know us then you know the real deal, so it doesn’t matter.

This is at least the second time this kind of direct and awkward conversation has happened. I’m not even going to tell you what happened trying on dresses the other day, so let me leave it at this. The people here are very warm, but with Singlish and the language barrier, the phrases come out quite direct and could be hurtful if you took it the wrong way. Luckily, I was primed about this little pattern and not affected, but I did have to relate the story above. It was just too good to pass up.